Adjusting to single life is interesting after a long relationship. It’s even more interesting adjusting in a world where things like snapchat and going to town weren’t part of life when I went into it. I’ve emerged on the other side into a whole new world of strange things.
For starters, my snapchat perviously had about six friends all who received pictures of my horse or me pulling faces. I’d sometimes send photos when I felt like I looked pretty. But there was little snapchating. Actually, I could probably have counted on one hand the amount of times I’d snap someone in a week.
So, I’m having to learn all these things like who you send what kind of snap to, when you send a snap, how many you send in a day, why not to use snapchat when drinking, that no one cares about my stationary order at work, and just what kind of angle and lighting works for that winning selfie. Gosh there’s a lot to learn. The worst part about it is I’m pretty sure I miss the mark constantly. Heck, I only just learnt it was possible to send a photo saved to your phone rather than only send photos you’ve just taken. I also learnt you can take photos and save them to your phone before sending them!
Going out is also a whole new ball game. Before there was no such thing as free drinks and there was that awkward conversation starter of ‘is that your boyfriend?’ And I never stopped to think about giving my number to anyone. Actually I had a great fake number I used on occasion.
I’m now realising there’s more to going out than I’d ever have imagined. Free drinks are great but there is probably a limit to how many one should consume in a night. People do ask for your number and it’s super strange when you have no idea what or who they are when they do use that number, and people can easily find my name on Facebook (who knew people could even spell Sacha correctly?) Going out is really fun, being hit on is no longer awkward, but suddenly I have absolutely no idea how to have a conversation with some stranger I met once, I have no idea if I should even talk to said stranger. And I no longer know if I should put people in their place when they try their luck a little too much. I’ve concluded yes but I don’t understand anything about this.
Suddenly relationships seem far more complicated than I ever realised. I have no idea what to say to people or how to have conversation with someone I might be interested in. I have no idea what’s talking too much or not enough. I don’t even know what I want from someone let alone asking all these questions.
Being 22 and single is a very weird place to be.
It’s not a bad place to be.
I just realise how strange life really is at times and how much relationships and how we interact with people has changed in the past few years. It’s only been four years and this feels like an entirely new world. I mean, I didn’t even really use Facebook that much to talk to people and now I have to figure out how often people actually chat and what sort of things they chat about.
I certainly know what I don’t want. But it’s not always easy defining what I do want.
Suddenly I’m no longer a journalist, I’m no longer dating someone, and I no longer compete my horse. Everything I used to define myself isn’t there anymore. And I have to just be me. I know me, I like me, it’s just a very new thing for me to let other people know and like me. There is absolutely nothing to hide behind and I have no option other than to be honest and open and myself.
That is a strange thing to face.
So, onwards and upwards as always. Life is great; I’m not getting enough sleep as always, I’ve had too many good weekends as always, I need to be kinder to my body as always, but I’m no longer as sick as I was and I’m loving life. Things are good. Everything is a learning curve, but it is good. I’m me, I like me, and that’s what counts.